Sunday, July 20, 2008
not been very productive recently... guess my maths mock is gonna be disastrous =s... at least, for me.
FIRST: THANKS KEN FOR THE SUPER WONDERFUL SONG!!! 石欣卉-我知道我变漂亮了!!!! WOOT~ THANKS!!!
ok, start with the usual commentary. wed was late. got detained. attituded him. but some councillors were affected. sorry. managed to settle pledge cards stuff. took early leave. home. rest. study. went to yf hse in attempt to finish a very difficult puzzle. DAMN. REALLY DIFFICULT.
thurs. HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO YENSZE, who is currently the SAME AGE AS ME. and she called me LAO REN. NICE ONE AR GIRL. LOL. TRY HARDER =x. skipped maths. was going through vectors. heard some idiots from s9 walked out just nice mr leow walked in. damn. nvm. continue to mug.
fri. shouted at by miss yew in the morning. reprimanded by mr leow. my diction. whole day unsettled. civis. realised we're not on our own. class tee dunno why some idiot see ler buey song. it was approved. how can you don't know the rules. if you don't even know the rules as well as i do, dun try to scold me. no use. you should punish yourself triply. losing more and more respect for you. i can no longer keep a central view about you anymore, even though i tried persuading others to. this is what happens when things gets extreme. maths mock prelims. done only 63%. well done-_-. die-_-. and if i went for that lecture, i might finished even lesser of it. I COMPLETED VECTORS. and people told me they finished the questions went through during lecture within 20 mins and spent the rest of the time doing their own things. met yf and aaron at the bus stop. had dinner with them. decided to go home early. so, no library.
sat. mugged. at lib. saw shiyun and justin. finally, a bit more focused.
all these measures, only make students more tempted to apply for unlimited study break. especially J2s. if we still go to school, it is because we are interested in the lessons. although it is only revision. we may be late, but that does not mean we are not interested. the only wrong we've done is being irresponsible and not puntual. this measure only have one result: once students realised that the school gate is closed, they just turn back immediately, since they cannot attend lessons anyway. so the rate of people being late goes down, but the absentism rate increase. maybe i don't know which is worse. all i know it, it used to be "
迟到好过
没到, better late then never", but now it is "
没到好过
迟到, better never then late". nice one. AND. what about respect for the religion? you should be a role model. YOU ARE NOT A RELIGION.
regarding the maths lecture. even though we have our reasons, which are valid when it applies to us, but still, i agree we're still in the wrong. so, i'm not saying anything else since i ranted alot at the front.
and my class tee. IT WAS APPROVED. and which part of it are you unhappy about? IT WAS APPROVED BEFORE WE ORDERED IT. UNLESS YOU PAY US BACK THE MONEY,YOU'RE NOT GONNA STOP ME FROM WEARING IT. the only consideration i have is not to get him in the trouble. realli realli touched by these teachers who realli realli understand. but my childish side says that i should still wear and show him the approval slip. THE CLASS TEE MEANS A LOT. maybe not to everyone, but at least a bunch of us, i'm sure. DAMN YOU.
in case anyone is thinking of ways to threaten to sue me with this post, you are not finding any form of slander here. =D
this whole chain of stuff is making me very dishearted. say i'm childish, for all you want. I STILL AM A CHILD. i dunno whether i've realli grown up, or am i just forcing myself to, but most of the time, i try my best to take a balanced view. but, ultimately, there will still be times when i can or wanted to get extremely childish and unreasonable. i'm not infallible. and it does not help when i keep on getting the feeling that i'm the only one trying my best to understand the other side.
maybe its the amount of dramas i watched. and the weird thing about me is, i don't take in everything. i'll analyse what i've seen and put it in real life. to an extent, it also make me less trusting and more suspicious everytime. perhaps that is why i prefer to hide my true emotions as well, for various reasons. and sometimes, when i look at some of my friends, i wonder why they can be so... human? or natural? HAHA nvm i dunno what i'm saying.
or maybe it's the environment i grew up in. although i stay in a guardian's hse, i'm no astray kid because i have a good guardian eyeing on me. HAHA sounds weird but nvm. i love my family. but we never told each other that. sometimes when i think about how we push the good food to each other by saying that we're too full or things like that, i realli feel lik laughing. LOL. ya, smiling now. i don't grow up in what is called the "hugging family". we care, but we don't show each other. maybe is because i grew up in my guardian's house, and my mother only have time to scold me in attempt to make sure i behave whenever she comes over, my family is not close. both my sis and i are closer to my guardian. maybe because that it why, i always feel weird showing my gratitude and feelings to people.
and i realised, being able to reason well and maturely is important, as it is the only way to overcome the fact that the loudest wins in my family. with reason, i will not be intimidated by the way people shouts at me, because i know i'm on the winning end of the argument.
there's always two sides, or even a third, to the same thing.
--I Need a Nap--
1:25 AM
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