stress level now hits a new high and boom~ disagreements, overusage of the f word comes along~ but the programmers are sure united haha... well, and not to forget the fact that some of us are gettin sick as well :s gg la~and the amount of $$ each of us have to fork out (no idea when we'll have it back), the amount of things we have to do T.T well but, we'll do it!!! die die also will complete

expecting some good show tml, like, updates? 4 days left, of which 2 are on weekends. have fun eh~

not to say i'm not worried, but i realised that since some stuff are supposedly none of my business, i shall stand by and watch... with much disappointment, but well, i know i've tried

twist of event is shocking but well, guess we have no choice... and we responded quite well to it, i think :D good work

all of us, get well before it :D











with regards to another issue...

i tot my confirmed list will be out by monday? wahaha~

we have increasing factors, but spending is to slashed to only slightly more than half the original.. nice~

well, not everything is as easy as it seems...

and trust me, if i'm out to do something, i'll make it the best... not just in terms of delivery, but also in terms of feasibility... whatever others might have thought of... i would have

which is why everytime you shoot me something, i can explain my rationale behind everything

and for me, i should really control my emotions and be more objective... it's really my fault for not being so (THIS sentence is really NOT sarcastic... i really think it's my fault... in this segment)

like what she said... we're expecting a surprise :D jiayou












and once this is over... i'll be much more free... will u trust me?

and can i trust that you do take what i said seriously?

or more like, u'll remember them... cos that matters to me...

i dun wan it to end on misunderstandings and childish reasons again 1:02 AM
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unexpected. but well...

work wise, things seems to be picking up... at least i know what i'm doing and stuff... and i see the proposal coming out ler~~~ that's good haha....

happened to meet shangzhi on the way home ytd and decided to go over and see how they

his bday ytd :) realised been quite long since we chatted over the phone liddat... too busy ba~

life... what does it hold? 8:55 PM
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guess i was too sensitive, with regards to the previous post... nth was said about feeling of displeasure towards me... sounds like self denial? like again and again... but, it doesn't matter if i'm happy :) ... the stone is still there but at least i'm looking at the side that makes me happy now :)

i know everything is piling up, and it'll come crashing down on me someday, someday... and i hope to tidy up the stuff before that happens... waiting for the appropriate time, appropriate mood... I dun want to start on the wrong piece and the stack eventually crash down before i can put anything into place... yet i'm afraid that all these waiting is piling the stuff up...

i cant do this alone... i need help... i wonder if the same sentiments is shared?

and time is so little... i wanna be happy in the little time i have... yet... somehow, things are beginning to end unhappily... and i'll spent the whole of the time alone thinking about it, getting emo over it, convincing myself that i'm just too sensitive, become happy over just a sms and thus convince myself successfully.... and remains happy till the next time something happens again...

the previous post was supposed to be much longer... too much i wanted to say... but i was too tired after the 2 gatherings that followed the incident... and i'm glad for some company like this :) ... though they have no idea that my insides was tearing like shredding papers, i laughed and forgot about everything while i was with them... for the moment...

HAHA... this is always what happens when i start expecting too much... haha... i should really stop hoping for what i'll nv get, so i'll be happier when it comes... stop saying what i want or expect, so i'll nv feel upset when i know someone is always gonna hear, but not listen... and stop putting in so much, so i wun feel unappreciated everytime something backfires...

perhaps, i'm just not that important...

and no... that was not an emotional statement... i'm certainly important, i know... to certain extent... and yes, i know i'm not always important... and the problem lies with me being someone who cannot express myself correctly... my concern for others, and my fears... and i'm not someone interesting, always too serious... but i do like myself for who i am... at least i know, there is so much things i can do, cause i'm mature enough... so much achievements i can expect... and so much happier just exploring life despite all the stumbles and falls...

he asked if everything is ok and i said yes, abit hesitantly... i hope next time, i dun have to hesitate... and he dun have to do anything again

anw~

wingkin is back! frm hongkong haha... had a nice time chilling up and updating each other (mainly zk's love life xD) at the coffee club (Holland V)... haha wanted to eat chicken rice but the stall was closed. thus, we had zhi char instead~ crabs!!! lol... nice~

and ya~ lots of things are going on, now that i'm out of my chicken pox

toyRus stocktake~ interesting!!! wasn't as lucky as my lingling, but at least i did not have to count batteries (that was emo)

recees~ good place we found! and had an impromptu recee on sun nite~ damn dark! lucky zq drove, we ended at one plus =s sad thing is, he had to drive all the way to the other end of sg den back to central again... nice of him to send me home :) though lik, he shld? lol but! at least i see the stuff coming out :D

went to pick saga seeds with steph too! got like 500+ of it... lots of them at st andrews cathedral!~ haha interesting exp, we were lik, why are we doing all these? HAHA

celebration brought fwd to wed since he had duty on sat... damn cork up... but, at least it wasn't sth we always do together :)

went on air on 933FM live too~ on thurs, for our publicity~ thr was nth much, but it was kind of interesting... at least i didn't say anything wrong xD shopped on fri with joanne~ haha i didn't see anything i like but she found some nice stuff... had dinner with dear after meeting up with zq to discuss about the ideas... enjoyed the atmosphere of the dinner that day :D

Happy - Leona Lewis

Someone once told me that you have to choose
What you win or lose
You can’t have everything
Don’t you take chances
You might feel the pain
Don’t you love in vain
’cause love won’t set you free

I can’t stand by the side
And watch this life pass me by
So unhappy
But safe as could be

So what if it hurts me?
So what it I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge,
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me
'cause I just trying to be happy
I just wanna be happy, yeah

Holding on tightly
Just can’t let go
Just trying to play my role
Slowly disappear
But all these days
They feel like they’re they’re same
Just different faces
Different place
Get me out of here

I can’t stand by the side
Ooh, no
And watch this life pass me by
Pass me by

So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge?
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me
I’m just trying to be happy

Oh, happy
Oh

So many terms that I can't see
Like I'm a stranger on this road
But don't say victim
Don’t say anything

So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge?
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don’t care about all the pain in front of me
I just wanna be happy
Happy
I just wanna be
Oh
I just wanna be
Happy. 4:07 AM
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how about... start thinking about how i would feel before focusing on expressing displeasure...

lik... over material stuff, and things that are probably not even my fault... things i didn't wish for to happen and i cant prevent... 4:13 AM
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money, can u drop down from the sky?

i could really use some of them now... alot of things and places i wanna go... no money means i have to give something up lol... the chicken pox period induced much financial loss and caused lots of problems for me to slowly pick up and solve... and not that i dun wan to listen to my mum, yea i know she's worried but i got things to do!!! lik, i cant even eat chicken??? for 100 days? den wat do i eat during my camp? grass?? and both events in my charge are at night -.-

ok back to money prob... i guess, i wun be able to make it for foc krabi trip then, since i've gotta pay by 7 jul... and this period i can really use quite a bit of $$$... and the toyRus pay, may get back to us by only 17th -.- just hope my open house pay comes in soon!!! =s... totally received no news on it yet, even after emailing in to the in charge =s damn lar =s

and i'm still cracking my head over some other stuff... haiz... so many factors to consider...

anyway, ps man was just getting more and more boring as i saw the next ep (18) picking up as more stuff were revealed... and i forced myself to stop cos ep 19 is not even out yet -.- i hate waiting for new eps =s

so in all, i'm glad i went for the training today. though there were awkward moments somehow LOL 2:31 AM
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shifted from s25 blog:

"my mood was just getting better when i realised, i've this student, whom for the whole of last month, i only gave her tuition ONCE... this is NOT THE FIRST TIME, and the best thing is:

IT WAS JUNE LAST MONTH. JUNE HOLIDAYS.

so yea. off with the stuff about school. what about the time when she forgot and said she wanted to watch movie? i really cannot understand, what is tuition for since she cannot keep up with it?and what do i say everytime her mum ask me why i only went a few times?

another talk, i guess. if it doesn't get better in july, i have no idea how i'm going to continue teaching. the girl is smart actually. it all depends on how much she really wants to put in."

the post was actually posted yesterday, some time after the first post. i typed this into the wrong blog...

ps man said 他妈的爱情, i say 他妈的水痘

goin out for job training tml ba i think, attire: long pants + cardigan haha... i'm def not walking anywhere far =s

date changed to sun. i think i should be able to go? since i already decided to go out on fri? HAIZ... 10:31 PM
______________________________________________________

ying ming aka cabbage/veggie/veg/cai/cat
18
8th Oct 1990
libra
veggie-caBB bytch of bytch clan

piano!!!
3E'05 chalet
mahjong
no quarrels
sing!!!
buy all the nice books
slim down =s
dance
keep in contact
new clothes, bags, shoes, accessories =x
tuition jobs


A* alyssa~andrew
B* bernard
C* candy~ceyu~chunsern~claudia
D* dickson
E* emerson~esther
F* fangming
G* glennda
H* helga
I* ivy~ivyt
J* jannifer~jiahao(blogspot)~jiahao(xanga)~jianfu~jiaying~jinhwee~jinyi~junyong~juenkeat
K* kaiying~kamin~ken~kerina~kokleong
L* leongaik~leslie~limying
M* maybellina~meilingjie(msteo)~michelle~mindy~mrchuarc
N* natalie
P* pearlyn~peishan
R* radzuan~renwei
S* sandy~sayhoe~seokhui~shijie~shuqi~shuhui
T* tingwei~tiongmeng~tommy~tommy(jj)
V* valerie~vanessa
W* wanyee~weeleong(blog163)~weeleong(blogspot)~wingkin
X* xinyi~xuanqi
Y* yensze~yingling~yitan~yunfan
Z* zhangfan~zhihao

Others*
=> TC club
=> Lesvy love blog(Leslie + Ivy)
=> 07S25
=> Mrs Ho-Lau's Tian Kong
=> Xia Xue

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|Noonie|
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+It's funny why '
+thinking of those happy times with you '
+brings me tears. '
+And it's funny why '
+thinking of those times we argued '
+brings me laughters. '

.w.e. .a.l.w.a.y.s. .l.o.o.k. .b.a.c.k. .a.n.d. .s.i.g.n.
.t.h.a.t. .w.e. .h.a.d. .f.a.i.l. .t.o. .t.r.e.a.s.u.r.e.
.t.h.e. .p.a.s.t.
.a.n.d. .w.i.s.h.e.d. .t.h.a.t. .w.e. .c.a.n. .g.o. .b.a.c.k.
.t.o. .h.o.w. .t.h.i.n.g.s. .u.s.e.d. .t.o. .b.e.
.t.h.a.t. .i.s. .w.h.y. .w.e. .n.e.v.e.r. .t.r.e.a.s.u.r.e.
.w.h.a.t. .w.e. .h.a.v.e. .n.o.w.
.a.n.d. .o.n.l.y. s.i.g.n. .w.h.e.n. .i.t. .i.s. .g.o.n.e.
.n.e.v.e.r. .t.o. .r.e.t.u.r.n.

____when_we_were_young______
__we_want_ to_grow_older__
_now_that_we_have_grown_up___
_____we_want_to_go_back___
_to_how_things_were_________
______when_we_were_young_